Stephanie Rumble, the voice behind The Style for Life podcast, brings decades of experience as a fashion stylist, health educator, and confidence coach to the forefront in this inspiring episode on how to be confident. Broadcasting from Santorini while travelling with her daughters, Stephanie shares personal stories, coaching insights, and research-backed tips to help you feel more confident in every area of life.

Whether you’re struggling with self-worth, looking to grow professionally, or simply want to feel more secure in yourself, this article unpacks key themes from her podcast and offers a grounded, compassionate roadmap to regaining self confidence and stepping into your power.

What Does It Mean to Be Secure With Yourself?

Being secure with yourself isn’t about arrogance, perfection, or always being the loudest in the room. It’s about trust: trusting your decisions, respecting your boundaries, and being okay with who you are, flaws and all.

“You don’t have to be loud to be confident.” ~ Stephanie Rumble

Person balancing in a one-handed handstand on a boardwalk by snowy mountains, symbolizing strength, balance, and inner security. — Being secure with yourself means finding balance, confidence, and strength from within. Like holding a handstand, it’s about trust, resilience, and self-belief in any setting.

Stephanie shares that confidence isn’t a one-time achievement. It’s something you can develop, nurture, and grow over time. It can be quiet, resilient, and even gentle. But it’s deeply rooted in self-respect and alignment with your values.

Signs of someone who is secure with themselves include:

They take risks outside their comfort zone
They accept compliments without deflecting
They listen more than they speak
They set boundaries and know when to say no
They don’t pretend to be someone they’re not

Learning what it means to be secure with yourself is a valuable part of the confidence journey. It often begins with self-awareness. The more you observe how you respond to praise, decisions, and challenges, the more opportunities you have to strengthen your inner resilience and clarity.

Building Self Worth and Confidence: Start From the Inside Out

Many people think confidence is just about appearance. But real self worth and confidence come from internal beliefs, healthy habits, and how we speak to ourselves.

“You’re not broken. You just need structure, support, and time.” ~ Stephanie Rumble

Stephanie identifies several red flags that signal low confidence:

Constantly worrying about what others think
Overthinking and second-guessing
Avoiding eye contact or social situations
Negative self-talk and fear of failure

To counter these patterns, Stephanie recommends starting with foundational wellness:

Sleep: Prioritise restful, undisturbed sleep
Nutrition: Eat nourishing meals that support physical and mental health
Movement: Choose physical activity that makes you feel good

These aren’t just surface-level strategies. Stephanie's coaching highlights how these everyday choices directly influence your confidence, shaping how you carry yourself, how you interact with others, and how you face challenges. Developing confidence from the inside out helps cultivate the resilience and calm strength that anchors lasting self-worth.

Ways to Build Your Self-Esteem Every Day

There are dozens of practical ways to build your self-esteem, and many are surprisingly simple. Stephanie shares 13 of her favourites in the podcast. Here are a few highlights:

Keep promises to yourself
Speak positively to yourself
Help others or give back
Practise gratitude daily
Try something new regularly

Confident young woman points upward toward the sky, representing growth, positivity, and building self-esteem step by step each day. — Self-esteem grows through daily practice. Small steps like setting boundaries, affirming your worth, and celebrating progress help you feel stronger, more confident, and secure each day.

These aren't just fluffy feel-good tips—they are supported by behavioural science. Self-esteem grows through consistency and self-trust. When you show up for yourself repeatedly, you gradually start to believe in your own capabilities.

“Small wins lead to big change.” ~ Stephanie Rumble

Stephanie also reminds us that confidence doesn’t require perfection. Instead, it’s about being kind to yourself on the journey, showing up with authenticity, and giving yourself credit for progress, not just outcomes.

How to Regain Confidence and Motivation After a Setback

Life throws curveballs. Whether it’s illness, a career transition, or emotional burnout, everyone faces moments of uncertainty. Stephanie reminds us that it’s normal to lose confidence, but also possible to rebuild it.

Here are ways to regain confidence and motivation:

Celebrate small wins: even tiny successes build momentum
Reconnect with your values: remind yourself what truly matters
Start again, gently: take one step forward, no matter how small
Surround yourself with support: lean on others who uplift you

When you're rebuilding confidence, reflection is key. Take stock of past achievements and acknowledge your personal growth. Confidence isn’t about never falling. It’s about learning to rise again, stronger and wiser. Stephanie encourages reaching out for support, whether through coaching or therapy, as a meaningful step toward lasting change.

How to Be Confident in Your Appearance

As a stylist, Stephanie sees firsthand how appearance can impact confidence. But she’s quick to point out—it’s not about size, age, or trends. It’s about intention.

“You can wear the bright lipstick, or not. It’s not about the lipstick. It’s about how you feel when you wear it.” ~ Stephanie Rumble

To be confident in your appearance, start by:

Dressing in clothes that fit and feel good
Choosing colours that suit your personality and skin tone
Paying attention to grooming and self-care

Confident woman smiling in a pink blouse and white pants outdoors, showing how self-assurance in appearance enhances presence. — Confidence in your appearance comes from posture, style, and self-belief. When you smile, stand tall, and wear what feels authentic, your confidence naturally shines through.

Your clothing choices can support your identity and help express who you are. When what you wear feels aligned with how you see yourself, it boosts your presence and self-assurance. Stephanie emphasises that dressing well is not vanity. It’s an act of self-respect and self-expression. Feeling polished can change how you approach your day and how others perceive you.

If you're unsure where to start, her personal styling services offer colour consultations, wardrobe audits, and body shape advice to help you feel confident and stylish in every setting.

Confidence and Mental Wellbeing: What the Research Says

Building confidence is not just about career success or personal appearance—it’s a key pillar of mental wellbeing. The following research highlights how confidence is developed and why it matters:

Good mental health helps us feel happy, confident and secure, and it can be cultivated regardless of a mental illness diagnosis (Mental Health Foundation)
60% of high-school-aged young people in a 2021 survey reported good to excellent mental wellbeing (Ministry of Health – Youth Health Overview)
Confidence is a skill that can be developed over time through goal-setting and personal growth (Psychology Today)
88% of people in New Zealand believe sport and physical activity help build confidence and offer opportunities to succeed (Sport New Zealand)

Infographic on confidence and mental wellbeing showing stats on mental health, youth wellbeing, confidence as a skill, and sport’s role. — Confidence and wellbeing go hand in hand. From youth mental health to sport and goal-setting, the data shows how building confidence supports happiness, security, and success.

These statistics reinforce the idea that confidence is not fixed—it’s a living skill that we can nurture and improve at every stage of life.

How to Be More Confident at Work

Whether you’re applying for a promotion, speaking in meetings, or leading a team, workplace confidence is essential. But imposter syndrome is real and often affects high performers the most.

To be more confident at work:

Dress the part and show up professionally
Prepare thoroughly before meetings or presentations
Speak clearly and assertively, even if your voice shakes
Accept praise without brushing it off
Set boundaries that protect your energy

Confidence at work stems from clarity—knowing your value, being ready to contribute, and understanding how to communicate effectively. Stephanie advises her clients to keep a regular log of wins and lessons. When you know exactly what you’ve achieved, it becomes easier to show up boldly, advocate for yourself, and stand out professionally.

If you lead a team or work in a customer-facing role, Stephanie’s education workshops offer resilience training, conflict de-escalation, and stress management tools to elevate both individual and organisational confidence.

The Role of a Confidence Coach

As a seasoned confidence coach, Stephanie has worked with clients who look polished on the outside but feel unsure or unworthy on the inside. Her approach blends mindset, styling, wellness, and accountability into one powerful transformation.

Working with a coach can help if you:

Struggle with low levels of self-confidence
Want help regaining self confidence after life changes
Need tailored support to set and achieve personal goals
Want to feel confident in your appearance, decisions, or relationships

With the rise of digital coaching, access to an online confidence coach means support is more accessible than ever. It’s a practical, empowering way to invest in yourself and break free from old patterns with expert guidance.

How to Love Yourself and Be Confident in a Relationship

Confidence isn’t just about solo success. It impacts how we relate to others. Stephanie encourages listeners to look at the relationship between self confidence and intimacy.

“If you’ve lost your spark, it doesn’t mean it’s gone. It just means it needs reigniting.” ~ Stephanie Rumble

To feel more secure in relationships:

Know your worth, regardless of your partner
Communicate needs clearly
Keep your identity and hobbies outside the relationship
Don’t rely on others to validate your appearance or choices

Understanding how to love yourself—and be confident—in a relationship lays the foundation for mutual respect and emotional safety. When you maintain your sense of self, you’re less likely to lose your identity or abandon your needs for the sake of harmony. Healthy confidence brings balance, openness, and emotional resilience into your most intimate connections.

How to Be Confident During an Online Interview or In-Person

Job interviews can test anyone’s nerves, especially in virtual formats. Stephanie recommends practising confidence cues ahead of time:

Dress well, even on video calls
Use open body language
Prepare answers and questions in advance
Maintain eye contact through the camera

Knowing how to be confident during an online interview allows you to present your best self, even through a screen. Preparation reduces anxiety, while intentional non-verbal communication conveys poise and professionalism. Stephanie reminds us that confidence in interviews isn’t about being perfect—it’s about being present, prepared, and self-assured.

How to Be More Confident While Speaking

Public speaking is one of the most common fears. Stephanie suggests that confidence while speaking begins with mindset and body language.

Ground yourself with deep breathing before you begin
Make eye contact (in person or via camera)
Speak slowly and clearly
Don’t aim for perfection—aim to connect

If you’re learning how to be more confident while speaking, consistency is key. Confidence grows each time you share your voice, especially when you let go of the need to be flawless. Whether you’re leading a meeting or giving a toast, your presence and authenticity will resonate more than any scripted perfection.

Final Thoughts: You Can Learn to Be Confident

Confidence isn’t something you’re born with. It’s something you build.

As Stephanie Rumble explains throughout her podcast, it’s possible to grow your confidence no matter where you’re starting from. Whether you want to improve your health, advance in your career, or feel more secure in relationships, confidence is the thread that connects it all.

Start by taking small, consistent actions. Show yourself kindness, surround yourself with support, and remember: you don’t need to be perfect. You just need to be willing.

Confidence is a skill. And like any skill, it can be learned, practised, and mastered with the right tools, habits, and mindset.

If you’re planning an event or need an experienced motivational speaker, explore Stephanie’s offerings in speaking engagements. She brings warmth, wisdom, and professionalism to every presentation, and can tailor sessions to uplift your audience or team.

Listen on Spotify

Frequently Asked Questions

What are the first signs of low self-confidence?

Low self-confidence can show up in subtle but consistent ways. You might find yourself overthinking, avoiding eye contact, struggling to accept compliments, or worrying excessively about what others think. These behaviours often point to deeper patterns of self-doubt that can quietly affect your decisions, relationships, and sense of self-worth.

How do I start rebuilding confidence after a setback?

Start by celebrating small wins and being patient with yourself. Set realistic goals, reflect on what you’ve learned, and surround yourself with supportive people. Stephanie Rumble recommends reconnecting with your values and using structure, such as coaching or wellness routines, to rebuild confidence one step at a time.

Why does appearance affect confidence so much?

What you wear influences how you feel and how others perceive you. Feeling comfortable and intentional in your clothing choices helps reinforce your identity and self-respect. Stephanie’s approach to styling isn’t about following trends—it’s about aligning your outward appearance with who you are inside.

What is the link between mental wellbeing and confidence?

Confidence and mental health are deeply intertwined. When you feel confident, you're more likely to feel capable, connected, and in control. Good mental wellbeing supports emotional resilience, helping you stay calm and focused, especially during challenges. The two work together to support overall life satisfaction.

Can confidence really be learned?

Yes, confidence is absolutely a learnable skill. It grows through consistent practice, self-awareness, and goal setting. As Stephanie explains, it’s not about perfection—it’s about showing up, trying again, and building self-trust over time. You don’t need to be born confident to become confident.

What role does a confidence coach play?

A confidence coach offers structured guidance to help you develop self-belief, emotional resilience, and accountability. Stephanie Rumble’s coaching combines mindset work, appearance, and wellness to create real-life change. If you're ready for personalised support, accountability coaching might be the next step.

How can I feel more confident at work?

Confidence at work comes from preparation, clarity, and self-advocacy. Keep a log of your accomplishments, dress intentionally, and practise speaking clearly and assertively. Stephanie also encourages building your confidence through tailored tools like her education workshops, designed for both individuals and teams.

Why do I feel confident in some areas but not others?

Confidence is contextual. You might feel strong at work but uncertain in social settings—or vice versa. This is completely normal. Each area of life brings different expectations and challenges, so confidence develops at different rates depending on your experience, mindset, and habits.

What if I’ve never felt confident in my life?

It’s never too late to build confidence. Even if you’ve struggled with self-doubt for years, you can still create a foundation of self-worth through small, daily changes. Stephanie’s podcast episode reminds us that self-confidence isn’t fixed—it’s built by showing up for yourself, one choice at a time.

Is dressing better really a form of self-care?

Absolutely. When you choose outfits that suit your shape, colouring, and personality, you’re sending yourself a message that you matter. Stephanie’s personal styling services help clients connect their internal identity with external expression, often transforming their mindset in the process.

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