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Understanding Empty Nest Syndrome

Nov 21

9 min read

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In this honest reflection, Stephanie explains how empty nest syndrome can be difficult—yet also a powerful chance to grow, reconnect, and embrace the next phase.

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What Is Empty Nest Syndrome

Challenges of Empty Nest Syndrome

Empty Nest Syndrome Depression

Coping With Empty Nest Syndrome

How to Cope With Empty Nest Syndrome: Stephanie’s 8-Step Framework

Getting Over Empty Nest Syndrome: The Positives of This Season

How Long Does Empty Nest Syndrome Last

Empty Nest Ideas for a Meaningful Future

Final Thoughts: Surviving and Thriving in the Empty Nest Years

Listen on Spotify

Frequently Asked Questions


In this heartfelt episode of Style for Life, Stephanie Rumble opens up about her personal journey through empty nest syndrome, a common yet often misunderstood experience faced by parents when their children leave home. With raw honesty and warmth, she explores the emotional weight and psychological shifts that arise when the house becomes quiet, routines change, and life enters a new season. Drawing on her background as a fashion stylist, accountability coach, and mother of four, Stephanie shares practical strategies and deeply personal reflections that offer both validation and inspiration. If you're navigating this stage of life and are unsure how to rediscover your identity and style, her personalised personal styling services may offer the perfect support.


From emotional challenges to surprising positives, this episode covers the full arc of surviving empty nest syndrome, making it a must-listen for any empty nester or those preparing for life after kids leave home.


What Is Empty Nest Syndrome


Empty nest syndrome refers to the emotional transition many parents experience when their children leave home. This phase can stir up feelings of loss, uncertainty, and vulnerability.


“You can feel like you’ve lost your identity.” ~ Stephanie Rumble

A woman stands in a bright, minimalist bedroom, looking thoughtful near the doorway with family photos displayed on a shelf above the bed.
Empty nest syndrome can feel overwhelming as children leave home. This stage often brings mixed emotions, but understanding it can help you adjust, rebuild routines, and rediscover your own identity.

Stephanie discusses that some of the challenges empty nest syndrome can be:


  • Sadness and grief.

  • Loss of identity and purpose.

  • Anxiety about children’s wellbeing.

  • Regret and guilt over past parenting decisions.


“You can also feel anxious over your child's wellbeing and independence. You can feel a loss of control. You can feel regret or guilt about your parenting.” ~ Stephanie Rumble

These emotions can surface gradually or arrive all at once, often triggered by milestone events such as university departures or a child moving cities. Stephanie reassures listeners that if you’ve felt this way, you are not alone—and these feelings are valid. Learning what empty nest syndrome is helps put words to a complex and shared experience.


Challenges of Empty Nest Syndrome


Like many life transitions, there are recognised stages of empty nest syndrome. Understanding these stages can offer clarity and help parents navigate the path forward with more self-compassion.


  1. Reality: The awareness that your children are no longer at home.

  2. Sadness and Grief: Mourning the end of daily parenting.

  3. Adjustment: Developing new routines and redefining your role.

  4. Renewal: Reclaiming purpose and personal growth.


Throughout the podcast, Stephanie walks us through these phases using moments from her own parenting journey. Her honesty, especially about how the early years were immersive and identity-defining, offers real comfort to listeners facing similar feelings. These stages of empty nest syndrome remind us that transition, while painful, is often the first step toward growth.



Empty Nest Syndrome Depression


One of the deeper effects of this transition can be what’s often referred to as empty nest syndrome depression. While not universal, for some, this shift can lead to emotional low points that interfere with daily life.


“The emotional and psychological impacts are the most significant.” ~ Stephanie Rumble 

Signs to watch for include:


  • Persistent low mood or tearfulness.

  • A sense of feeling empty or unmotivated.

  • Sleep disturbances or appetite changes.

  • Withdrawal from hobbies or social connections.


Woman sitting in a cosy chair by a window, holding a cushion and looking thoughtful, reflecting the emotions of empty nest syndrome.
A quiet moment of reflection captures the loneliness and emotional weight many parents feel during empty nest syndrome, as they adjust to a new chapter with compassion and self-understanding.

Parents may face cultural pressure to embrace their newfound freedom, but that doesn’t mean the sadness isn’t real. If you're feeling stuck, talking with a counsellor or joining an empty nest support group can provide a helpful outlet. Being aware of these empty nest syndrome symptoms ensures you're not dismissing something that deserves care.


Coping With Empty Nest Syndrome


Stephanie encourages a proactive approach to coping with empty nest syndrome. With time, reflection, and support, this transition can be transformed into a period of renewal.


Here are several strategies to explore:


  • Acknowledge your emotions without judgement

  • Connect with others or join a support group

  • Communicate regularly with your children in ways that work for both sides

  • Establish new daily rituals to create structure

  • Use journaling, mindfulness or therapy to navigate your inner world


“A reduced focus on active parenting means that you can build a stronger connection with your partner.” ~ Stephanie Rumble

While each person’s experience is different, the essence of coping with empty nest syndrome lies in being kind to yourself and open to what’s next. Stephanie encourages listeners to view this time not as an end, but as the beginning of a new relationship—with yourself.


How to Cope With Empty Nest Syndrome: Stephanie’s 8-Step Framework


Stephanie shares a powerful framework that helps unpack the emotional complexities of empty nest syndrome. This practical breakdown reframes each challenge as an opportunity for growth and redefinition.


  1. Identity Crisis: Rebuild your sense of self beyond parenthood.

  2. Anxiety and Worry: Learn to trust your children’s independence.

  3. Loss of Control: Shift from managing to mentoring.

  4. Regret and Guilt: Let go of perfection and embrace learning.

  5. Financial Pressures: Re-evaluate what support looks like now.

  6. Role Transformation: Develop an adult relationship with your children.

  7. Unrecognised Grief: Allow yourself to mourn this change.

  8. Changed Social Interactions: Reconnect with existing friends or create new communities.


Two women laughing over coffee and a daughter hugging her mother, highlighting the importance of connection during empty nest syndrome.
Meaningful connections with friends and family play a central role in Stephanie’s 8-step framework for coping with empty nest syndrome, helping parents rebuild confidence, support and emotional wellbeing.

These insights reflect the emotional spectrum many parents move through. Stephanie’s candid stories give shape to abstract feelings, and show that learning how to cope with empty nest syndrome can also lead to unexpected personal evolution. If your transition includes redefining not just your emotional identity but your visual one, a colour analysis consultation can be a powerful way to reconnect with yourself on the outside and in.


Getting Over Empty Nest Syndrome: The Positives of This Season


Stephanie highlights the positives of empty nest syndrome as a chance to rediscover joy, purpose, and freedom. Getting over empty nest syndrome doesn’t mean forgetting your children—it means expanding your own world in ways that support your growth and fulfilment.


Stephanie encourages listeners to lean into the freedom this phase brings by embracing the many positives that can unfold:


  • Rediscover and pursue personal interests.

  • Focus on career and professional development.

  • Allow more time for self-care and mental well-being.

  • Take pride in seeing your children become successful, independent adults.

  • Deepen marital or partner satisfaction.

  • Nurture a new parent-child dynamic grounded in mutual respect and supportive friendship.

  • Build stronger social connections with both old and new friends.

  • Spend meaningful time with ageing parents.


These aren't merely distractions—they are meaningful ways to rebuild a rich life. Stephanie’s own story exemplifies this, as she shifts her focus to professional growth and rediscovering her own passions. This mirrors the journey many women take when stepping into midlife reinvention—something she explores further through her education and workshops. For anyone currently navigating the challenge of getting over empty nest syndrome, this chapter can mark a powerful return to self.


How Long Does Empty Nest Syndrome Last


A frequently asked question is: how long does empty nest syndrome last?

There’s no universal answer. It depends on your personality, your life stage, the support around you, and your willingness to adapt. Stephanie openly shares that even two years later, she still experiences waves of longing for the daily chaos of a full house. That doesn’t mean she hasn’t grown—it means the love is still alive, and grief sometimes revisits us in gentle reminders.


Adult and child hands gently holding an empty bird’s nest, symbolising the emotional transition and uncertainty of empty nest syndrome.
Change can feel tender at first, yet with time it opens space for new confidence, deeper connection, and a clearer sense of who you’re becoming as life gently reshapes around you.

Contributors to duration include:


  • Strength of emotional identity tied to parenting.

  • The speed and timing of children leaving home.

  • Support systems and social outlets available.

  • Life transitions happening simultaneously (e.g. menopause, retirement).


“It’s about shifting from a hands-on parent management role to being a supportive guide.” ~ Stephanie Rumble

Whether it takes months or years, Stephanie's reminder is simple: be patient with the process. If you’ve ever asked yourself the question, “how long does empty nest syndrome last,” know that it can ease over time with care and intention.


Empty Nest Ideas for a Meaningful Future


The question of what to do with an empty nest doesn’t have to be intimidating. This season of life can be a valuable opportunity to rediscover yourself and embrace what's next.


Some top empty nest ideas include:


  • Book a solo or couple’s getaway

  • Join a course or learn a creative skill

  • Volunteer in your community

  • Sign up for a fitness or wellness class

  • Turn a spare room into your dream retreat or home office


“It's now time to focus on your health, fitness, and mental wellbeing... that greater self-care piece is huge.” ~ Stephanie Rumble

These suggestions aren’t about filling a void. They’re about creating a vibrant, aligned life. The empty nest years can be among the most creatively fulfilling if we allow ourselves to dream again.


Final Thoughts: Surviving and Thriving in the Empty Nest Years


Surviving empty nest syndrome doesn’t mean enduring sadness indefinitely. It means recognising your own transformation. Stephanie Rumble gently reminds us that the empty nest years are not the end of your story. They’re a powerful continuation.


Stephanie Rumble standing beside a calming room scene with a quote about the emotional impact of empty nest years and regaining control.
The challenge of stepping back from active management of a child’s daily life — Stephanie Rumble, Founder of Bright Red.

Whether you're seeking help for empty nest syndrome, exploring life after kids leave home, or simply navigating a quieter house, this podcast offers deep reassurance. Stephanie’s wisdom invites you to reflect, rebuild, and reconnect—with yourself, your partner, and your purpose. And if you're part of a team, business, or organisation looking to support your staff’s wellbeing during transitional life stages, her de-escalation training and conflict education may provide valuable tools for building resilience and communication in the workplace.


Take this moment to reimagine your identity, pursue long-held dreams, and celebrate a life that continues to evolve. The empty nest may feel quiet—but it holds endless possibilities.


Listen on Spotify



Frequently Asked Questions


What are the emotional stages of empty nest syndrome?


Parents often experience a range of emotions when their children leave home. These can include sadness, grief, confusion, and eventually acceptance and renewal. Everyone’s journey is different, but recognising these stages can help you understand that your feelings are valid and part of a natural process.


How long does empty nest syndrome usually last?


There’s no set timeline for how long empty nest syndrome lasts. Some parents adjust in a few months, while others may take years to fully adapt. It depends on your lifestyle, emotional connection to parenting, and what support systems you have in place. Being kind to yourself during this transition can make a big difference.


Is it normal to feel lost when your kids leave home?


Yes, it’s completely normal to feel lost or unsure of your identity after years of raising children. Your role and daily routine may feel dramatically different. This period of adjustment is a good opportunity to explore your interests, seek support, or even work with a coach to help redefine your goals and sense of purpose.


Can empty nest syndrome cause depression?


In some cases, yes. While not everyone experiences depression, the sense of loss and isolation can trigger symptoms in some parents. If you’re feeling persistently low or disconnected, it may help to speak with a professional or explore support options like counselling or an empty nest support group.


How can I rediscover myself after the kids leave?


Start by reconnecting with interests you may have put aside, trying new experiences, or setting personal goals. Many parents find that taking a colour analysis consultation or exploring personal styling can help them reconnect with who they are now, both inside and out. Stephanie offers personal styling services that are tailored to life transitions like this.


What if my partner and I feel disconnected?


This is a common concern. Without the shared focus of parenting, couples may need to rebuild their connection. Make time for each other, explore shared interests, or consider relationship coaching. Deepening your connection at this stage can bring renewed satisfaction to your partnership.


How can I strengthen my relationship with my adult children?


Your relationship with your children evolves once they move out. Focus on building mutual respect and a more mature, friendship-based connection. Keeping communication open and respectful—without being overbearing—is key to this next phase of parenting.


What are the benefits of this new season of life?


Many parents find they now have time for personal growth, travel, career development, or self-care. This season can be full of opportunity. If you’re feeling stuck, consider accountability coaching or a workshop to help you move forward with purpose. Explore workshops and coaching designed to support your next chapter.


Are there any support services for this transition?


Yes, there are many. From coaching and counselling to group programs and personal development tools, support is available. Stephanie’s accountability coaching can help you regain clarity, set goals, and navigate this emotional shift with confidence.


What if I'm not ready to let go?


Letting go doesn’t mean losing the connection. It’s about finding a new way to relate to your child and allowing both of you to grow. It’s okay to take time. This journey is not about rushing but about adjusting and eventually embracing a new rhythm.

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Stephanie Rumble

021 605 755

Christchurch, New Zealand

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