Male Loneliness, Human Connection and the Power of Community with Paul Morrow
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The Power of Human Connection in a Disconnected World
Understanding the Root Causes of Male Loneliness
The Village: Why Community Still Matters
The Role of Volunteering in Connection and Purpose
The Benefits of a Men’s Walking Group
Long Marriage and the Changing Dynamics of Connection
Advice for Young People Navigating Disconnection
How to Improve Human Connection in Daily Life
Final Thoughts on Combating Male Loneliness
Stephanie Rumble returns with a powerful episode of her Style for Life podcast, diving into a topic that resonates with many: male loneliness. She is joined by Paul Morrow, chaplain of St Andrew’s College and founder of a long-running men’s walking group. Together, they explore the often-unspoken emotional lives of men, the importance of human connection, and practical ways we can support connection at every stage of life.
The Power of Human Connection in a Disconnected World
The theme of human connection runs deeply throughout the conversation. Paul and Stephanie reflect on the changing nature of social interaction, and how modern life, technology, and the pace of living have contributed to growing disconnection. Everyday gestures, such as greeting strangers on a walk or exchanging a few kind words at the café, can significantly improve wellbeing.
Social connections, both casual and deep, are essential to a content life. According to Paul, studies like Harvard's Good Life project show that it's these daily moments of engagement that most strongly predict happiness and longevity.
These simple interactions are accessible to everyone. Yet in an era dominated by screens and personal silos, they’re too often overlooked. Making human connection an intentional act could be one of the most transformative things we do.
Understanding the Root Causes of Male Loneliness
Male loneliness is a unique and pressing concern. As men age, particularly after children leave home or careers wind down, they can find themselves without emotional outlets or consistent companionship. Unlike women, who may be more accustomed to nurturing emotional bonds, many men lack the habits or spaces to maintain meaningful connections.
Paul discusses how the empty nest syndrome affects many men. Without intentional efforts to stay connected, the loss of routine and identity can lead to increasing isolation.
“We are empty nesters for the first time this year, and it puts an emphasis on what you need to start to work on in your own relationship within your marriage.” ~ Paul Morrow
He also notes how men often struggle with vulnerability and self esteem, especially during major life changes such as retirement or declining health. Admitting loneliness can feel shameful, and seeking help isn’t always seen as socially acceptable. Creating new connection patterns requires effort, emotional literacy, and a redefinition of masculinity itself.
“Watching young people give back and help others definitely helps boost their self-esteem and their sense of worth.” ~ Stephanie Rumble
This period of transition is also when personal clarity and confidence can be restored through external support. Stephanie’s work in accountability coaching supports individuals to re-establish structure, set meaningful goals, and stay emotionally grounded during change.
The Village: Why Community Still Matters
Paul reflects on the concept of "the village", a broader community of intergenerational support, and how it has eroded in modern society. Young people often lack older mentors, while older adults are increasingly disconnected from younger generations. This gap creates a void in emotional guidance and communal resilience.
“I think our village has diminished significantly. Our children are having far less interaction with a wider group of people and therefore have less input into their lives.” ~ Paul Morrow
Without a strong village-style structure, people are often left to navigate life’s challenges alone. Resilience, identity, and social confidence all suffer.
Paul introduces the idea of a personal wisdom table, from Ben Pilgreen's Bring It Out, where individuals intentionally surround themselves with mentors who offer encouragement and accountability. These supportive figures aren’t there to critique, but to offer perspective with compassion.
“Young people lack strategic people in their lives—a 'wisdom table'—who will speak into them simply because they want the very best for them.” ~ Paul Morrow
The Role of Volunteering in Connection and Purpose
For those feeling unmotivated or isolated, volunteering can be a powerful path to reconnection. Paul shares compelling stories of how helping others often leads to personal transformation.
Volunteering can:
Improve mental health and reduce feelings of loneliness.
Strengthen communities through community service.
Provide structure and interaction beyond digital spaces.
“An antidote to self-absorption is service. If you go out and help others, it changes your focus from your own problems to the world around you.” ~ Paul Morrow
Engaging in volunteering also contributes to our emotional wellbeing. It allows us to shift our focus outward—towards someone else’s needs. This aligns closely with the concept of the pleasure of giving, which is known to trigger positive chemical responses in the brain. The result is often a stronger sense of identity, belonging, and optimism.
The Benefits of a Men’s Walking Group
One of the most moving stories from the podcast is the creation of a men’s walking group started by Paul and his friend Simon. Originally a way to stay active following Simon’s physical health diagnosis, the weekly walks quickly grew into something much more—a lifeline of camaraderie.
The group offers men a non-judgemental space to connect, share, or simply walk in silence. With over 250 people having participated over ten years, it has become a consistent, supportive fixture for many.
The benefits of walking and connection include:
Better physical health and energy.
Time in nature away from screens and stress.
A chance to decompress emotionally in a relaxed setting.
Consistent accountability through a shared routine.
“Interacting with the natural world—walking in the forest or a tramp in the hills—brings a sense of how beautiful our world truly is.” ~ Paul Morrow
Described by Paul as “low pressure, high value,” the group offers regular support without expectations. For many, it’s the only scheduled time in the week for genuine interaction. A walking group like this is a simple but effective model for building connection.
For those seeking more structure and personal strategy, Stephanie also offers one-on-one coaching for wellbeing and motivation, helping individuals move forward with clarity and purpose.
Long Marriage and the Changing Dynamics of Connection
Paul and Stephanie also reflect on the changes that come with a long marriage, especially as children become independent. Suddenly, couples must reconnect without the structure of parenting to lean on.
Stephanie shares insights from her 30-year marriage, and Paul discusses the adjustments he and his wife have made. They both stress the importance of communication, curiosity, and creating new shared experiences.
Books like Atlas of the Heart by Brene Brown have helped couples navigate this shift. Brown’s insights into emotional language and unspoken expectations offer practical frameworks for reconnection during this later life stage.
This is also a point in life where image and identity may shift. Stephanie’s personal stylist services support clients to rediscover confidence, ensuring that how they present themselves reflects the person they’re becoming—not just who they were.
Advice for Young People Navigating Disconnection
Young people today face increasing levels of disconnection, shallow social interaction, and a lack of emotional resilience. Paul notes that many young men struggle with shame, identity, and a reluctance to seek help.
“Social engagement is the number one predictor of living a long, content, fulfilled life. That includes everyday interactions with people we don't even know.” ~ Paul Morrow
He also points to the dangers of excessive screen time and the emotional consequences of pornography and performance-based culture. A lack of failure tolerance and few emotional role models have left many adrift.
Some helpful approaches include:
Creating opportunities for healthy dating and friendship.
Encouraging multi-generational mentoring.
Promoting purpose through a sense of meaningful work and contribution.
Talking openly about mental health and emotional pain.
Paul references Johann Hari, whose book Lost Connections highlights how societal trends have driven the rise in antidepressants as a quick fix—when the real solution often lies in human connection, purpose, and community.
“Those incidental, small connections on a daily basis have a big impact on our mental health. Sometimes you have to push yourself a little to do it.” ~ Stephanie Rumble
Stephanie’s training programmes also support young adults and workplace teams to navigate emotion, communication, and inclusion. Her workshops and speaking sessions help make these skills both practical and empowering.
How to Improve Human Connection in Daily Life
Improving human connection doesn’t require huge effort. Paul and Stephanie both suggest that small, intentional interactions can lead to deep and lasting change. Try:
Making eye contact and smiling at people you pass.
Engaging in short conversations throughout your day.
Saying “yes” to invitations, even when it’s outside your comfort zone.
Hosting or attending small, consistent meet-ups.
These everyday actions help reduce anxiety and strengthen emotional resilience. Being present and open to interaction creates momentum for future connections.
Participating in a walking group, in particular, is a low-barrier way to build relationships. Shared physical activity removes the pressure of eye contact or deep talk and allows connection to unfold naturally.
Final Thoughts on Combating Male Loneliness
Male loneliness is not just a personal issue. It’s a societal one. But the solutions don’t have to be complex. As this podcast reminds us, connection can be found in simple routines, shared moments, and a willingness to engage.
Build your own personal wisdom table.
Join or create a walking group.
Make time for volunteering and giving.
Reinvest in your long marriage with presence and purpose.
Offer consistent accountability and safe conversation for younger people.
“If you are at a point in your life where you have more capacity, volunteering is a great way to have others contribute to you while you give back.” ~ Stephanie Rumble
Through this honest and insightful conversation, Stephanie Rumble and Paul Morrow show how connection can transform not just individuals, but communities. Sometimes, all it takes is a walk, a conversation, or a smile to begin again.
If you're interested in going deeper with your personal growth, relationship to others, or sense of clarity, Stephanie offers a range of transformative services. From wardrobe audits and colour consultations to fashion stylist training, Bright Red can support you in presenting yourself authentically and confidently—inside and out.
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Frequently Asked Questions
What are simple ways men can reconnect with others?
Reconnection doesn’t need to be dramatic. Small, everyday actions like joining a walking group, sharing a coffee with a neighbour, or attending a community meet-up can help men rebuild meaningful connections. These actions create space for natural conversation and trust to grow over time.
How do walking groups support mental wellbeing?
Walking groups offer low-pressure environments where men can enjoy physical movement while engaging in side-by-side conversation. This creates opportunities to open up emotionally without the intensity of face-to-face discussion. It’s a relaxed, natural way to support mental clarity, connection, and routine.
What role does routine play in staying socially connected?
Routines like weekly walks, group coffees, or volunteering create predictable opportunities for connection. Consistency helps relationships deepen, while also offering emotional benefits like structure, purpose, and accountability. These routines don’t need to be big—they just need to be regular.
Why is it important to have a 'village' of support?
Having a village of support means building connections across age groups, backgrounds, and communities. It offers perspective, guidance, and a sense of belonging. Whether it's mentors, family, or friends, this network strengthens resilience and creates spaces where people feel seen and supported.
Can men benefit from mentorship and accountability?
Absolutely. Having someone to speak with openly—whether a peer, mentor, or coach—can help men stay focused, aligned, and emotionally balanced. Mentorship offers wisdom, while accountability fosters personal growth. Services like Stephanie Rumble’s coaching provide structured, empowering support for building new habits and direction.
How can volunteering help improve connection?
Volunteering creates a sense of purpose while fostering connection with others. It shifts the focus outward and builds self-esteem through acts of service. It’s also a great way to meet like-minded people in low-pressure environments where shared values naturally build bonds.
What makes long-term relationships more connected?
Intentional communication, curiosity, and shared experiences are key. As life changes, couples benefit from re-learning how to be present with one another. Tools like emotional language, respectful listening, and renewed shared goals make a big difference.
How can families support young men with connection?
Creating open, judgement-free environments helps young men feel safe to speak honestly. Encouraging real-life social interaction—like volunteering, sport, or shared hobbies—offers valuable opportunities to build confidence and connection. Modelling emotional openness is also key.
Is it possible to build strong social habits later in life?
Yes. Connection is not bound by age. Whether it's joining a group, starting a new hobby, or seeking coaching, it's never too late to build meaningful social habits. Services that focus on personal development and wellbeing can help create momentum and restore clarity.
How can workplaces support better human connection?
Workplaces thrive when team members feel connected, supported, and seen. Training that focuses on emotional intelligence, de-escalation, and communication—like those offered by Bright Red—equip people with practical tools for real-world connection. The result is stronger collaboration, less stress, and healthier culture.
